Grandpa refuses to let daughter replace the vase her 2-year-old son broke, constantly complains about it for months on end: 'He had the right to complain that my son had damaged his property'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Apr 11, 2025 8:00 AM EDT

Mistakes happen, especially when kids are involved. One time, I was over at a neighbor's house when one of the other neighbor boys broke the 2006 flat-screen TV, and it was a doozy. When I was a kid, I accidentally flooded the house because I left the bathroom before checking if the toilet had flushed all the way. Kids are a recipe for disaster, and the worst part is that they are usually unable to atone for their mistakes financially. They can give a tearful apology as much as they want, but they usually can't literally fix it with glue and ingenuity. If I broke my roommate's air fryer, I would give him a sincere apology that I hope he would appreciate, but I would also just buy him a new air fryer! But if a 2-year-old breaks his grandfather's beloved vase, his mom must be the one to atone for him with dollar bills. 

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  • That's precisely what happens in this story, but the grandpa is wishy-washy about whether he actually wants his daughter to replace it or not. When he talks to her, he says he doesn't, but he tells a different story when he discusses the matter with other people.

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    via Tim Doerfler

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.
     

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    AITA for telling my father to get over the vase my son broke?

    When I was a teenager, my father bought a large glass vase, which he filled with wine corks. For years, it stayed on top of a small table in the living room.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
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    Cheezburger Image 10492388864
    via Ted Whitney

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    AN 23154-1618 2018 2018
    via blackieshoot

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    My family visits him monthly for lunch. Last October, my son was running around my father's living room and accidentally knocked the table over, which caused the vase to fall down and break.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
  • 06
    I immediately apologized and offered to buy a new vase. My husband and I also cleaned everything up. My father declined my offer to replace it. At the time, he said he understood it was an accident and was just glad my son hadn't gotten hurt (he was two years old at the time, and there was a lot of glass on the floor).
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
  • 07
    During the next couple of months, I apologized and offered to pay for a new vase multiple times. My father continued saying it was fine.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
  • 08
    However, earlier this year, my father started talking about how much he loved the cork vase, and how expensive it had been back when he bought it. As the following months went by, his complaints began to escalate.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
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    He'd make comments about the fact that my son broke the vase almost every time we came over. Occasionally, he'd also "joke" that we should plan our visits with longer notice so that he could hide his valuables from my kid.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
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    Last week, he threw a party at his place, which we attended. A friend of his who hadn't visited in a while noticed the vase was gone and asked about it, to which my father replied that "my little sh" had broken it and I hadn't replaced it.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
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    My husband was nearby and heard it. After the party, I confronted my father, and we fought. He said that he had the right to complain about the fact that my son had damaged his property.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
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    I told him that while he has the right to be upset, the fact that he declined my offer to buy him a new vase does not entitle him to complain about me not doing it. He can either retract his forgiveness and work something out with me or get over the vase and stop blaming my toddler for the accident. I won't have him calling my son names over this.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
  • 13
    My father is still insisting I'm in the wrong here. AITA?
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
  • 14
    DenizenKay The solution would be to buy him a vase for father's day, his bday, Christmas....every holiday buy him a vase in perpetuity. Make him so plentiful with vases he wishes he never sees another vase again. Problem solved. Nta
    via u/DenizenKay
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    uniqueme1 I love the way you think! ETA: Or, buy him an empty vase and bring a bottle of wine to drink to deal with your dad's crotchetiness. Deposit cork in vase. At the next party, point out how many times you had to drink to deal with his complaints.
    via u/uniqueme1
  • 16
    Marine_0311 NTA. FFS, your son was a toddler doing toddler things. Your dad should have toddler proofed the house. You offered to pay for a new vase, he declined, he can STFU about it. I always thought collecting and displaying wine corks was bizarre. Hey look at how much I drink everyone!
    via u/Marine_0311
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    Inevitable-Fox 7946 OP He's pretty proud of the corks, actually.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
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    enzothebaker87 In that case why did he not just keep the corks and let you replace the vase? This all sounds so ridiculous on his part. The name calling would have been the final straw for me though.
    via u/enzothebaker87
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    HippieGrandma 1962 This exactly. If anyone referred to my child as a "little sh "they would not be seeing us for quite a while. Let him wallow in his anger.
    via u/HippieGrandma1962
  • 20
    addangel because some people love to complain and to milk being a victim indefinitely. it's infuriating
    via u/addangel
  • 21
    Far_Nefariousness 773 Esh I wasn't allowed to run around in others homes. I blame the parents and your father for complaining. Also why wouldn't you just buy a new vase anyways. My dog broke my dads glass water bottle. It was a special bottle that cost him $100. He said don't worry about it. Since he had it on the edge of the couch and all my pup did was walk by. I literally found the same bottle and shipped it to his home. He was super happy although he said he didn't need another.
    via u/Far_Nefariousness773
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    When my friends come over we go to a park so the kids can run. At my grandmas house if the kids want to play; we sit on the porch. Children should learn boundaries of where to run and not to run. He's a toddler so he should have had some toys or took him outside. I can't imagine allowing my child to run around my dads house, he has a lot of glass. He's wrong for complaining, but you also should have just replaced it.
    via u/Far_Nefariousness773
  • 23
    SpaceAceCase THIS. Her kid broke it why would she not just replace it? What's this BS about asking if she had to, a sane person would just replace it.
    via u/SpaceAceCase
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    Inevitable-Fox7946 OP Commenting here because this is the most voted comment about this subject. I understand the assumption that I allow my toddler to freely run around people's homes. That is not the case. In this specific situation, my son started running around seconds before the accident happened, I just wasn't quick enough to stop him. In subsequent visits (to ANYONE, including my father), my husband and I have managed to stop him sooner. My son is generally a quiet kid, so this behavior i
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
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    Also, I offered to replace the vase more than once that day. He said no, so I didn't buy one. After that refusal, I had no reason to believe my father still wanted me to replace the vase. If someone gave me a similar offer and I declined, I would not expect them to go through with it, nor would I blame them for not doing so.
    via u/Inevitable-Fox7946
  • 26
    babcock27 But, see, you're supposed to read his mind and realize that his no meant yes. He's being a j and holding a grudge over a 2 year old. Get him another vase, slam it on the table, and tell him that if he ever mentions it again, you will no longer visit. I'd be totally pred about the little sh comment too.
    via u/babcock27

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family drama vase toddler accident mistakes reddit story Grandpa broken family grandparents grandson reddit thread daughter Reddit mistake son
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